Discover the Circle of Self — Rethinking Mental Health and Healing (Part 1 of 8)
Moving Beyond Diagnoses to Embrace Holistic Healing
This is the first post in my 8-part series on the Circle of Self. After you read this, check out part 2:
When I began my journey as a social worker over a decade ago, I was determined to follow a formula for success: get my Master’s in Social Work, earn my LCSW, become a Clinical Therapist, master the DSM-5, and use diagnoses as my power tool to cure mental illness. Fueled by ambition, I believed this path would ensure impactful work. Yet beneath that confidence lay a layer of anxiety, masking an unspoken imposter syndrome. Over time, the façade fell away, and I recognized that this "formula" was less about genuine connection and healing, and more about seeking external validation for my role.
Thankfully, my clients taught me a valuable lesson and revealed a deeper truth. Through their stories, they taught me that real healing isn't about categorizing problems but fostering connection and seeing the whole person. This insight not only reshaped my understanding of what it means to help, it revolutionized my overstanding of the human experience and guided me towards Revolutionary Social Work. It also illuminated just how poorly the medical model fits with the kind of work that's actually needed.
The medical model—with its focus on diagnosing and treating specific pathologies—is often at odds with the core of true healing. It prioritizes problem-solving over connection, labels over lived experiences, and symptom management over holistic wellness. While this model has its place in acute care, it fails to address the interconnectedness of human emotions, relationships, and environments. Healing, as I’ve come to overstand it, is not about eradicating pathology but about nurturing wholeness and balance. It’s about seeing the person, not the problem.
Around the time I was unlearning my faulty formula, I was introduced to the works of Roberto Assagioli, the founder of psychosynthesis. Assagioli’s teachings emphasized the idea of wholeness over pathology, and his philosophy deeply resonated with me. He posed a radical yet simple question: What if healing isn’t about erasing problems but about reconnecting to our innate sense of wholeness? Inspired by his ideas, and my own growing discontent with the traditional medical model, I started to rethink everything. This marked the beginning of what would later become The Circle of Self.
The Circle of Self
The Circle of Self is a framework born from my own experiences, both personal and professional. It is a holistic approach to living a healthy, happy, and balanced life by (re)connecting to seven key elements: movement, stillness, nature, community, spirit, nourishment, and love.
Each of these elements represents an essential facet of being human, and together, they create an ever-evolving picture of wholeness. And, importantly, The Circle of Self is a framework for us all. We must nurture our own Circle in order to share The Circle of Self with others.
Unlike traditional methods of self-improvement or healing, The Circle of Self doesn’t start with “What’s the problem?” or “What’s missing in your life?” Instead, it begins with curiosity and appreciation: “What elements in your circle feel nurtured and full? Which areas are asking for more attention and care?” This shift in perspective changes the narrative from one of deficit to one of abundance and possibility. By identifying the elements that are already thriving, we uncover strengths and insights that can be applied to other areas in need of nurturing. It’s not about achieving perfection but about fostering balance and connection—both with ourselves and the world around us.
Movement
Take, for instance, the element of movement. Movement isn’t just about physical exercise; it’s about honoring the body’s innate need for energy flow and expression. For some, movement might look like a morning jog or swim. For others, it might be dancing in the living room, gardening, or simply taking a walk in the park. For me, it starts in the morning with a yoga asana (postures) and pranayama (breath control) practice. I experience anxiety from the moment I open my eyes and this form of energy flow allows the anxiety to do just that...flow! When we nurture the element of movement, we’re not just tending to our physical health—we’re creating space for joy, release, and vitality.
The word "emotion" itself comes from the Latin word emovere, which means "to move." Emotions are energies in motion, and they yearn for movement. As clinical therapists, much of our work involves helping emotions find their natural flow and release. While physical activity can be an excellent vessel for this, so can other forms of expression like journaling, art, or music. These outlets allow emotions to surface, be understood, and ultimately transformed, encouraging deeper emotional freedom and balance.
Stillness
Then, there’s stillness, an element that feels increasingly elusive in our fast-paced, hyperconnected world. It’s an area where I have to intentionally focus my energy and attention otherwise it's lost in the chaos. Stillness invites us to pause, reflect, and simply be. It might come in the form of meditation, deep breathing, or even a quiet moment of solitude with a cup of tea. When my husband first introduced me to meditation, I would fall asleep after five minutes. It felt like a chore… a boring chore. And then, after our first two children, it felt like a chore I never had time for! Now, however many moments I can carve out, stillness feels sacred—a cherished retreat in the midst of life’s distractions. By cultivating stillness, we create a sanctuary for our minds and spirits to rest and recharge.
Nature
Nature, another cornerstone of The Circle of Self, reconnects us with our roots. I have lived in various different environments- in the U.K., Hawai'i, and Alaska- and this element looks different in each place. Though, what never changes, is the fact that we are a part of nature. Whether it’s standing barefoot in the grass, skiing down the slopes, swimming in the ocean, snacking under a tree, hiking through the woods, or gazing at the stars, nature reminds us of our interconnectedness and the cycles of life. It’s a grounding force that nurtures awe and humility- an under-utilized component when working in the clinical social work field. Living in harmony with nature also encourages us to honor cycles—our circadian rhythms, the seasons, and even hormonal patterns. Once I started to follow nature’s guidance on times of rest and times of high energy, I found balance, vitality, reduced stress, and a deeper connection to myself and the world around me.
Community
Then, there’s Community. As Social Workers, we overstand that a person's environment and social connections contribute significantly to their overall health. We are not meant to journey through life alone. Whether it’s through friendships, family, or chosen communities, this element reminds us that relationships are vital for our emotional and mental well-being. They provide support, joy, the opportunity to both give and receive, and learn and teach. As a family who has moved a lot over the past few years, I have a small community but value it more than ever. I have taken my relationships for granted in the past and let friendships fall to the wayside with the excuse of being "too busy". But, when I'm honest with myself, I make time for many other things that add nothing to my life in comparison!
Spirit
The element of spirit is often misunderstood as being tied to religion, but in The Circle of Self, it transcends specific practices or beliefs. 'Spirit' comes from the Latin word 'spiritus', which means "breath, breathing" and is about connecting to a higher consciousness, however that resonates for you. It could be through pranayama (breath control), prayer, dhyana (meditation), or simply a sense of wonder and gratitude for life. I have discovered beautiful gifts throughout the world (i.e. the 8 Limbs of Yoga, Rastafari, Buddhism) and curated something that works for me. This connection to Spirit fosters meaning, purpose, and alignment with our truest selves.
Nourishment
Then, one of my favorite elements to dive into is Nourishment, which goes beyond the food we eat. It’s about how we feed our entire being—mind, body, and soul. Nourishment might look like eating whole, vibrant foods, but it could also mean feeding the mind with inspiring books or nurturing the heart with creativity and play. This is one of the first elements I explore with people. Often, when there are significant depressive or anxious symptoms, there’s also a pattern of high sugar intake (especially soda) and high-processed foods, excessive social media use, and frequent exposure to violent and/or hypersexual media in movies, shows, or games. It’s not that there’s an innate problem with the individual; it’s an increasing challenge of living in today’s world. When we begin prioritizing nourishment, it’s like building a protective bubble that shields us from the overwhelming distractions of modern life. This foundational change leads to major shifts in overall well-being.
Love
Finally, there’s love—the thread that weaves through every element of the circle. Love for ourselves, for others, and for the world around us. Imagine if we all lived by these three principles. If I could create a law that everyone had to live by, it would be this! Love is the foundation of compassion, kindness, and acceptance, and it’s an essential ingredient in the journey toward wholeness and healing. However, it's hard to have genuine love for others and the world when you have never loved yourself. Then, how do we learn to love ourselves? It may be taking care of your own needs instead of everybody else's. It may be noticing (and eventually shifting) the language you use when talking about, and to, yourself. You may be led to understand why you use the language you do and the root of your understanding of self. It is a process, but it is worthwhile.
A gift to yourself
The beauty of The Circle of Self is that it’s not a rigid framework or a checklist to complete. It’s a living, breathing guide that evolves as we do. Some days, your circle might feel perfectly balanced; other days, one or more elements may need extra care. The goal isn’t to reach a final destination but to stay engaged in the process of self-reflection, growth, and evolution.
Over the years, I’ve witnessed the transformative power of this approach—not just in the people I work with but in my own life. I have not perfected each element, and that is not the goal. By embracing The Circle of Self, I’ve become a student of myself and found greater harmony, happiness, resilience, and connection. I’ve learned to honor my humanity, imperfections and all, and to see challenges as opportunities for growth rather than obstacles to overcome. I’ve also become a better therapist!
As you reflect on your own Circle of Self, I invite you to approach it with curiosity and compassion. Ask yourself: Which elements feel vibrant and full? Which ones are asking for more attention? How can you draw on your strengths to nurture the areas that need care? Remember, this is your journey, and there’s no right or wrong way to walk it. Wholeness isn’t about fixing what’s broken—it’s about embracing the beauty and complexity of who we are.
Journal Prompt
Which parts of myself have I been neglecting in the name of survival or productivity?
Which of the seven elements in the Circle of Self am I most connected to? Which one is calling for more attention?
When have I felt most whole, aligned, or alive? What elements were present in that moment?
Write freely. No judgment. Let the answers surprise you.
This post is part of an 8-part series on the Circle of Self ~